An Ode to Boorish Critics Everywhere

An Ode to Boorish Critics Everywhere
Aneleda Falconbridge, November 2008

It was a heated and a rufty day
though the sky above was clear.
From beneath a bonny shady tent
fair music wafted dear.
It drifted on the gentle breeze
like honey to the ear,
but honey draws the wasps out
and one quickly buzz-ed near.

“Your strings are not correct
That box is not hand-hewn.
There are no museum samples –
I saw all of them last June.
If you want to play around here
you had better get it right
for I’m the so-and-so-and-so
whose mouth is never tight.”

The Lady was a fighter,
but to this she did demur.
The incident she did recall:
’twas but a little burr.
She mentioned it in passing
and it caus-ed quite a stir –
Now everybody join the ode
to the rude and boorish cur!

“That song is not correct
you play a modern tune.
A piece played in your century
would not be so festooned.
If you want to play around here
you had better get it right
for I’m the so-and-so-and-so
whose mouth is never tight.”

Raise a glass ye singy ones
to critics near and far!
A smile to those with merit.
A shrug to those who spar.
Touch off your cacophony
with sackbutt and guitar
and entertain the many,
from the vintner to the czar.

Siiiiiiinnnngggg…
“My song is not correct!
My repertoire I’ll prune!
There are no museum samples?
Sir, this news has made me swoon!
Oh, I’d like to make an ode m’lord
please confirm while you’re in sight

That you’re the so-and-so-and-so…

That you’re the so-and-so-and-so…

‘Cause I’m a bardic so-and-so-and-so
whose mouth is never tight!!!”

A tale of sympathy for Lady Lann – a tale of The Bard and the Bee In
Her Bonnet. There’s no certain tune yet – but it should be perky. But
not particularly period. Probably could be played well with a
12-string. Or a banjo. 😉 Note to any boorish, grumpy people –
it’s all in fun. – Aneleda

For Burns Night – Caledonia

I wanted to recite something for Burns Night, and honestly, fair reader, it seemed foolish even to me to sit in an empty kitchen, staring down a can of “Caladonian Kitchen Haggis” and recite a poem to the can, so I decided that if I was going to do so, I may as well share.

http://mbouchard.com/misc/Burns-Caladonia.mp3

So it’s not period, Burns Night. Not by long shot, but I like it, and so, wi’ a bottle o’ Scotch before me, and a full glass, I decided to read a Robert Burns piece tonight. The piece I chose is a song, and the tune is one more often used with Burns’ “Banks and Braes” and is usually recorded with that. (I get it, I like to write ditties to the “Maltese Bransle” so you know, pick a favorite.) So I decided to sing the song without words as a backdrop, and someday I’ll match them up together.

So, here, “Caledonia” by Robert Burns, the beloved Scottish poet, for Burns Night.

Caledonia by Robert Burns, 1789
Tune: “Caledonian Hunts’ Delight” of Mr. Gow

There was once a day, but old Time wasythen young,
That brave Caledonia, the chief of her line,
From some of your northern deities sprung,
(Who knows not that brave Caledonia’s divine?)
From Tweed to the Orcades was her domain,
To hunt, or to pasture, or do what she would:
Her heav’nly relations there fixed her reign,
And pledg’d her their godheads to warrant it good.

A lambkin in peace, but a lion in war,
The pride of her kindred, the heroine grew:
Her grandsire, old Odin, triumphantly swore, –
“Whoe’er shall provoke thee, th’ encounter shall rue!”
With tillage or pasture at times she would sport,
To feed her fair flocks by her green rustling corn;
But chiefly the woods were her fav’rite resort,
Her darling amusement, the hounds and the horn.

Long quiet she reigned; till thitherward steers
A flight of bold eagles from Adria’s strand:
Repeated, successive, for many long years,
They darken’d the air, and they plunder’d the land:
Their pounces were murder, and terror their cry,
They’d conquer’d and ruin’d a world beside;
She took to her hills, and her arrows let fly,
The daring invaders they fled or they died.

The Cameleon-Savage disturb’d her repose,
With tumult, disquiet, rebellion, and strife;
Provok’d beyond bearing, at last she arose,
And robb’d him at once of his hopes and his life:
The Anglian lion, the terror of France,
Oft prowling, ensanguin’d the Tweed’s silver flood;
But, taught by the bright Caledonian lance,
He learned to fear in his own native wood.

The fell Harpy-raven took wing from the north,
The scourge of the seas, and the dread of the shore;
The wild Scandinavian boar issued forth
To wanton in carnage and wallow in gore:
O’er countries and kingdoms their fury prevail’d,
No arts could appease them, no arms could repel;
But brave Caledonia in vain they assail’d,
As Largs well can witness, and Loncartie tell.

Thus bold, independent, unconquer’d, and free,
Her bright course of glory for ever shall run:
For brave Caledonia immortal must be;
I’ll prove it from Euclid as clear as the sun:
Rectangle-triangle, the figure we’ll chuse:
The upright is Chance, and old Time is the base;
But brave Caledonia’s the hypothenuse;
Then, ergo, she’ll match them, and match them always.

http://www.robertburns.org/works/251.shtml

 

Thanks to Ray and Andrea Sprague for the haggis! I think I’ll try to have a Birka Burns’ Night this weekend!

 

(Note: Oddly, just as I posted this, outside the wind chime began blowing and I just heard it give one of the middle phrases from this song, I swear on my life. Perhaps a sign that Mr. Burns approves. I’ll take it as such at least.)

On Christmas Day

Merry Christmas to all my friends! You have been marvelous gifts to me, each and every one of you. Thank you!

http://www.mbouchard.com/misc/OnChristmasDay.mp3

 

The sun did rise on Christmas day,

And unto him the moon did say

There is Good News I must convey –

Gloria in excelsis deo,

 

A blue clad maiden mickle mild

Has brought forth this night a a little child

He shall be worshiped and reviled

Gloria in excelsis deo,

 

Laudamus te. Benedicimus te.
Adoramus Jesu Christe

 

At the moment of His birth

A dazzling star flamed o’re the earth

Trumpets and angels sang His worth

Gloria in excelsis deo,

 

A multitude then filled the sky,

Bid shepherds to the new King fly

In fear and joy they did comply

Gloria in excelsis deo,


Laudamus te. Benedicimus te.
Adoramus Jesu Christe

 

In softest straw the babe was laid

As shepherds and kings their homage paid

And sheep and oxen softly brayed

Gloria in excelsis deo,

 

All gathered round this little stall

To greet the King so very small

Born here as savior to us all

Gloria in excelsis deo,

 

Laudamus te. Benedicimus te.
Adoramus Jesu Christe

 

Anew now does our world begin

For God as Man has entered in

To save each one from death and sin

Gloria in excelsis deo,

 

Sing out with  praise Emmanuel (Gloria)

Play the loud harp and ring the bell (Gloria)

For God has come with us to dwell (Gloria)

Gloria in excelsis deo, (Gloria)

 

Laudamus te. Benedicimus te.
Adoramus Jesu Christe (Gloria)

 

Follow Me

This song is featured on the CD “I Am of the North” available for purchase online at:  http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/aneledafalconbridge/

I longed to be a gentle rose,
A flower sweet and fine.
It seems I’m better as the thorn,
But I hope you’ll still be mine.

To be a maiden shy I tried,
It made a laughing play.
I cannot pretend beneath this helm
That I am meek today.

Oh follow me, oh follow me
out on the fields of war
and you shall find devotion true
unlike ever seen before.

Fine silk I tear while running round,
satin dresses I wear through,
Though with solid armor on my form
I shall ever fight for you.

I will not feel your fingers warm
beneath my gauntlets bright
but if you’ll be sturdy as my sword
then all my world is right.

Oh follow me, oh follow me
out on the fields of war
and you shall find devotion true
unlike ever seen before.

I cannot dance as gracefully
as all those pretty maids,
but I will stay strong as fine steel
As their beauty slowly fades.

I cannot give to you that life
of calm domestic bliss
But follow me, and take my heart
you’ll ne’er regret this.

Oh follow me, oh follow me
out on the fields of war
and you shall find devotion true
unlike ever seen before.

*** *** ***

This song is one that I think perhaps comes from my service as bardic champion. As I reflect in the cold of autumn, and ready to visit Tir Mara to see the rattan and A&S championships, where I’ll bring my husband and son with me for the first time in a while, I started to think about what kinds of things I thought I would be, and what I turned out to be.

I’m not a domestic girl, but a tomboy, perpetually. I loved palling around on the field and arming up and thudding across Pennsic, as I’ve loved thudding across the kingdom this year. I have especially loved the moments when my war brothers and sisters have made me feel, quite ironically, like the strongest of all delicate flowers – they reminded me that I am more beautiful in my strength than in any coy weakness. So this song is for them.

And my sweet, quiet husband is dragged into my madness with such patience, that this song became one about asking one you love to come with you for the ride, promising that really, it will be worth it. So this song is for him.

O’er the Hills

Just in case the great peace of King Gregor does not hold, and Prince Kenric’s fears for a summer war come to pass, I have taken the liberty to make yet *another* set of lyrics to the traditional “O’er the hills and far away” song. I thought of all I had seen watching the battles from within and without this summer, and really, this was on my heart today.  Nov. 10, 2011

 

Chorus:

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

Muster all from northern shore

To give our foes their own what-for

We will merry take the day

Over the Hills and far away….

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

Come all warmed by southern sun

Battle ‘till our war is won

Together gather come-ye-may

Over the hills and far way…

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

War on, you brave unbelted men

With the fierceness each one ken

Where every blow you’ll twice repay

Over the hills and far way…

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

March on ye men of Chivalry

With honorable brutality

To take them down without delay

Over the hills and far way…

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

Allies bold and households brave

The way to victory you pave

Flushing out the azure tyger’s prey

Over the hills and far way…

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

Archers, siegefolk gather round

Rain your mayhem to the groun

O Blacken sky with your display

Over the hills and far way…

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

Bear the water, bring the meat

Supporters make the field complete,

With tabards, banners on display

Over the hills and far way…

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

 

Those who stand with tiger blue

Sing and yell the battle through

And our resolve will never sway

Over the hills and far way…

 

Over the Hills and o’er the plain,

Beneath the burning sun or rain,

For Eastern glory come today

Over the Hills and far away.

 

(This is the song, with different lyrics:  http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAsTBcoH5sA&feature=related )