An Ode to Boorish Critics Everywhere

An Ode to Boorish Critics Everywhere
Aneleda Falconbridge, November 2008

It was a heated and a rufty day
though the sky above was clear.
From beneath a bonny shady tent
fair music wafted dear.
It drifted on the gentle breeze
like honey to the ear,
but honey draws the wasps out
and one quickly buzz-ed near.

“Your strings are not correct
That box is not hand-hewn.
There are no museum samples –
I saw all of them last June.
If you want to play around here
you had better get it right
for I’m the so-and-so-and-so
whose mouth is never tight.”

The Lady was a fighter,
but to this she did demur.
The incident she did recall:
’twas but a little burr.
She mentioned it in passing
and it caus-ed quite a stir –
Now everybody join the ode
to the rude and boorish cur!

“That song is not correct
you play a modern tune.
A piece played in your century
would not be so festooned.
If you want to play around here
you had better get it right
for I’m the so-and-so-and-so
whose mouth is never tight.”

Raise a glass ye singy ones
to critics near and far!
A smile to those with merit.
A shrug to those who spar.
Touch off your cacophony
with sackbutt and guitar
and entertain the many,
from the vintner to the czar.

Siiiiiiinnnngggg…
“My song is not correct!
My repertoire I’ll prune!
There are no museum samples?
Sir, this news has made me swoon!
Oh, I’d like to make an ode m’lord
please confirm while you’re in sight

That you’re the so-and-so-and-so…

That you’re the so-and-so-and-so…

‘Cause I’m a bardic so-and-so-and-so
whose mouth is never tight!!!”

A tale of sympathy for Lady Lann – a tale of The Bard and the Bee In
Her Bonnet. There’s no certain tune yet – but it should be perky. But
not particularly period. Probably could be played well with a
12-string. Or a banjo. 😉 Note to any boorish, grumpy people –
it’s all in fun. – Aneleda