Instructions for the EK Bardic Championship, AS 46. In limerick for King Gregor.
Their Majesties each need a bard
To accomplish this should not be hard
We have set this day
For this noisy play
With the things you have writ on your card.
We now give the rules of the thing
You may recite, tell tales or sing
No punching or hitting
Nor swearing or spitting
Or we shall makes you compete into spring.
There may be a piece you abhor
Which you feel maketh your innards sore
If you’re rude lords and ladies
You’ll be sent straight to hades
Where its Neil diamond filk evermore.
The first round is period all
About each piece we’ll tell the hall
We need documentation
For each presentation
And it’s fine with us though if it’s small..
In the second round we shall favor
A piece the bard’s chosen for flavor
You’ve one six of an hour
To put us in your power
As your fine bardic skills we do savor.
Round three is their Majesties pick
To the things on your card they should stick
But if the crown wishes
That you sing and do dishes,
you’ll learn what makes your bold liege tick.
Ere we start, may we briefly advise,
The bard’s life is full of surprise
But we can already tell
You would do the job well
And to any challenge would rise.
The bard ought be on at all times
To amuse songs, stories, or rhymes
We must confess
That “your majesty, yes”
Is the very best of bardic lines.
And so as we exit our play
We wish all you well on this day
As you each compete
Before our crown sweet
Now enjoy it all well as you may!