Death Holds a Rapier – Ode to Jean du Montagne

“This song is one about my dear friend and merry minstrel partner-in-crime, Jean.”

http://www.mbouchard.com/misc/death-holds-a-rapier.mp3

If you are a rogue, a cad, a knave
I do not envy you
who would malign his captain
or insult his lady true
For I see your doom approaching
if that is who you are
in on hand death holds a rapier
in the other a guitar

If you are a rogue, a cad, a knave
then wary should you be
for there is a man among us
who fights with grand esprit
Honor does become him
know when you say “au rivoir”
in one hand death holds a rapier
in the other a guitar

If you are a rogue, a cad, a knave
who he has come to slay
you may hear a distant singing
that quickly comes your way
it is to give you warning
final thoughts for your memoir
in one hand death holds a rapier
in the other a guitar

If you are a rogue, a cad, a knave
polite while cavalier
if you honor king and lady then
you have nothing to fear
you may earn a throbbing headache
if you challenge him to spar
in one hand death holds a pint mug
in the other a guitar

you may earn a throbbing headache
if you challenge him to spar
for you’ll fill many a pint glass
as he plays on his guitar

Jean gets his OGRE
Jean gets his OGRE, and this song is for him on that day!

Northern Love

“That’s Northern Love” we said, and we all really, really meant it.

If you’re looking for a partner tough
Come find Northern Love
If you’re the kind who likes it rough,
Come find Northern Love
If your heart is set upon your sleeve,
but you can land a mighty cleave,
If of loneliness you’ve had enough,
Come find Northern Love.

If you want a woman who’ll hit you back
Come find Northern Love
If you want a man who can attack
Come find Northern Love
If you want a lass who’s never been meek
The North is where you’ll want to seek
If you’re looking for a weapons rack
Come find Northern Love!

If you want a man who’ll fight for you
Come find Northern Love
If you want your words both firm and true,
Come find Northern Love
If you want an equal in your bed
or swinging at your metal head
If subtlety you would eschew,
Come find Northern Love!

If you need a friend of loyalty,
Come find Northern Love
If beyond yourself you clearly see,
Come find Northern Love
If you love the game and love the fight
It’s likely you would last a night
and if you want to disagree….
Come find Northern Love!

 

Written May 2011